Level up!

Consulting in the OD (organisation development) space automatically implies talking about learning and personal growth opportunities, development areas, sometimes studying. In general: bettering yourself. Looking at ways to increase and improve your contribution, and of course weighing up your contribution and what it is worth.

If someone indicates that he/she is keen to formally study something, whether it is a diploma, certificate or degree of some sort, I am always keen to understand why? What is the motivation behind this? Is it an ego thing, or self-confidence issue – meaning this person needs to have the qualification to feel heard, or validated or to be able to intimidate? Or what is the real need behind it?

On the other hand, if the person is not keen to study, or do a course or training, or any sort of self-development, I find it even more challenging! What is the motive here? Does this person honestly think he/she knows enough, sufficiently, everything there is to know? If so, there is an even bigger ‘ego thing’ at play, or self-confidence issue brewing.

Please do not get me wrong, I am not implying that we all need to continuously attend courses, seminars or workshop, left right and centre. I just think, be open to a learning opportunity – whatever the format.

Obviously there are also levels, or depths of learning, to consider as this influence the contribution. At the end of the day it is the application of the learning that is critical. What sometimes scares me is when I see very senior people in organisations firstly not being open to learning, and secondly not being able to use the learning. The person would pass the recollection or recognition phase, and even the comprehension and understanding phase of learning, but that is it. No application. No further thought.  No contribution. And that is just sad, and if I may – a waste. Even more so if there is so much potential or talent to contribute.

The irony is that the contribution/creative/innovative phase is available or open for all, but it takes something else than perceived intelligence. So it is not just about the course, or MBA, or PhD. I like what Albert Einstein said: “Education is not the learning of facts, but the training of the mind to think.”

Motto Model: http://goo.gl/cNnpy and Motto Individual Assessment: http://goo.gl/UhC7V

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It's all about the money...

Not!

I have a client that has a saying (his dad's): "Men fight about two things: the one is women..." And the other? Money, of course. As much as I do not particularly want to talk about financial or economic worth and the relation to self worth, we would be ignoring the elephant in the room.

I mostly work in the private sector, where shareholding (read dividends), directorship (read status and power), bonuses and salaries are critical. Reward and recognition. This is all just dandy - great basic motivational tools. Where I get my knickers in a twist is when the remuneration stuff is directly linked to the personal development stuff.

The reason? People lie about their development needs, true feelings, real contribution and personal aspirations when they know it is linked to da mulla. Please note: I do not blame them at all. We all, always, want more money, whether in the form of dividends, bonuses or salary increases. The more money, the merrier.

Over the weekend I facilitated a workshop on self worth. What made this session interesting was that this was a group of women, mostly unemployed, but contributing tremendously to various communities and upliftment initiatives. In this instance the value of their contribution had no economic value for them. In my view their self value and self worth were mostly quite high, regardless of the lack of remuneration.

On the other side of the coin, in business or society, we often see people feeling inferior or over confident/arrogant because of their financial standing. Status and often power are being linked to financial wealth. The part that gets to me is when poor self worth leads to poor economic worth. In other words, you are not being paid fairly (market related, contribution related) because you, in essence, think that this is what you deserve.

Please do not storm into your manager's office after reading this and demand that increase because, like the L'Oreal ladies, 'you are worth it'! You might well be, my point is just that there could be a link between lack of self worth and lack of appropriate financial reward. And if it needs fixing, it needs fixing.

Motto Model: http://goo.gl/cNnpy and Motto Individual Assessment: http://goo.gl/UhC7V

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Looking good, feeling great!

During our carefree varsity days we used to say this all the time. Now, sleep deprived, often over extended, far less groomed, I find it not so easy to say.

While putting lipstick on one morning on our way to school (and work) one of the kids wanted to know 'why on earth would you put that stuff on your face?!' I explained that it makes me look a little prettier. The response: 'Really? You don't need it mom.' Well trained, hey?

I do believe beauty comes from within, and don't judge a book by it's cover, etc. etc. However, physical appearance makes a difference, whether we like it or not. It affects our confidence, mood, and whether we are indeed 'feeling great!'

In my line of work I am privileged to meet lots of different people of all ages, shapes and sizes with a variety of circumstances, attributes and histories. In my view 'looking good' has very little to do with any of that. It is something else. Something people sense, or feel drawn to, maybe something people see in you they can connect with.

Still, I do not want to underplay the importance of looking after yourself, because people notice that stuff. So maybe enquiring the help of a professional to assess your current 'visual state of affairs' is not such a bad idea after all. Or even being open to a fresh, funky new hairstyle (or even beard-style, however the case may be) could really give you some spunk.

I went to a kiddies party recently where there were quite a few interesting looking characters. While staring (sorry, this was quite extreme), I heard a comment from another party goer - 'Do some people not have mirrors?'

Personally, I love seeing uniqueness and character in personal appearance. And I know that it can be just as limiting or off-putting to over groom as it is to look a bit off. Somewhere between being your best comfortable self, and not underutilising your physical strengths, lays your ideal image.

Who knows, maybe now is a great time to try something new or even bold? (Pun intended.)

Motto Model: http://goo.gl/cNnpy and Motto Individual Assessment: http://goo.gl/UhC7V

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Adults only

Mature. Immature. Premature.

I have been pondering over these three words, mostly due to my exposure to the clash of the mature and the immature.

In my experience you find mature or evolved organisations (the internal workings, the people behaviour, the culture of a business). And then you find those businesses that are infant-like. Immature.

The thing with culture is that it is very much driven by the leaders, similar to a family set-up. Depending on the values and style of the parents/leaders, they will consciously or not decide on the accepted behaviours and norms, creating a mature or immature (or something in between) work space.

So where does the conflict come from? We are after all adults... I wish!

As much as it is a daily struggle to help my kids see that it is their responsibility to look after their stuff, do their homework and chores, in essence 'take ownership', it is a very similar challenge managers face.

And just for the record, in the adult world maturity is not necessarily related to age, experience or qualifications. It is a mind-set.

Also, I know that 'immature' organisations can really frustrate 'mature' staff. In these environments the leaders set autocratic and controlling parameters. They say (or think) things like: "You are here to do as you are told" - read: "Do not think, ask questions, or use initiative."

The result in the long run? A highly frustrated, under-utilised workforce.

Yes, I know the risk of over-exposing staff prematurely is just as bad. Timing is a challenge. It is very tricky, maybe even an art, knowing when to let go. To trust. Like with kids, you have to step back at some point, and also let them face the consequences or maybe, with a little luck, let them enjoy the success.

Motto Model: http://goo.gl/cNnpy and Motto Individual Assessment: http://goo.gl/UhC7V

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Keep it real, man!

I was shocked and saddened when a friend shared how she witnessed and fell victim to terrible, unethical choices a very senior business leader made in a large corporate. I know that horrible things like this happen all the time. And when you do not see it coming, it is much more upsetting.

During her interview and experiences at the company the perception was created that this leader was, in fact, a true leader. She was completely motivated, had belonging and felt stimulated. It was only when the head honcho had to make a moral decision that he failed. Miserably.

Admittedly it was devastating when his true colours became clear. The dilemma that my friend was faced with, was that now her own values, morals and ethics were not matching her leader’s. And subsequently the business culture’s.

In another conversation with a client, he expressed his frustrations with some of his senior management colleagues that are ‘pretending’. Not being authentic. Not being real.

Personally I have more time for someone that is real - knowingly and openly ‘not perfect’ - than for someone that are either pretending/faking it or still in denial about who or what they really are. In other words, they are not even aware that they are being pretentious.

As amusing as it can be to watch the games of the ‘pretentia’ (as my husband calls this group), when under pressure, it can be quite irritating to deal with.

Ayn Rand wrote it so beautifully in The Fountainhead:

"To sell your soul is the easiest thing in the world. That's what everybody does every hour of his life. If I asked you to keep your soul - would you understand why that's much harder?"

Motto Model: http://goo.gl/cNnpy and Motto Individual Assessment: http://goo.gl/UhC7V

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Square up

With some people it is so obvious how they see themselves: personality traits, mood, agenda. An open book, I tell you! They almost completely communicate through their bodies.

Research will tell you that when people interact, we ‘read’ a lot more in the physical experience and observation than in the words.

Some time ago a close family member had a tiff with one of my kids who, at the then age of two, primarily communicated with his body. The grown-up, a committed non-body language reader, could for the life of him not see what this little boy was telling him. It took an almost full family intervention to convince the grown-up of the toddlers plans and motives. He did not use words, it was visible in his body.

I understand it is not the best thing to make assumptions and conclusions based only on what is visible. However, we do it all the time. It is a reality. When someone enters the room slouching, what do you assume? Tired, depressed, sad, low self-esteem… The list goes on.

Interestingly, in yoga, one of the very effective mood lifting techniques are back-bends. Again, there is a physical and emotional connection.

I went through quite a taxing and an emotionally challenging time not too long ago. When I went for my maintenance visit at my BSR-guy (Body Stress Release), he made a comment on how my shoulders were in a bit of a slouch. And have I noticed how the elderly enfold as if to protect the heart?

When dealing with clients, I have seen so many times how the person that seems happy, confident and passionate will get the promotion, or the job, or the praise, or the raise. Decisions are often not only consciously made on the facts, nor the logic - the left brain stuff, but also based on all the mushy, perception, touchy-feely stuff.

I am a firm believer of managing perceptions, not as a means to manipulate, but to sketch the most accurate picture of who and what you are – what you have to contribute. So let’s ‘square up’.

Motto Model: http://goo.gl/cNnpy and Motto Individual Assessment: http://goo.gl/UhC7V

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Geniuses

“I treat them like geniuses” - the response to how my son interacts with his friends.  As much as I would have loved to say that he got the insight from his mother, alas, I cannot…

After an intense time of trying to fit in, dealing with bullies and finding his own group of friends, he finally came home with the news: “We are like a team, mom!” When enquiring a bit more, he gave me the secret to his success - treat them like geniuses.

During a catch-up conversation with an old client/friend, she reveals why she is ecstatically happy in her new job. “It is amazing, this guy manages me as if I have been there for years.” The team made it so easy for her to fit in, and to simply get on with it.

Early on in my career I realised that my individualism and entrepreneurial spirit would not make me the perfect employee, hence my specialised field of consulting. That does not mean that I do not enjoy working in teams though (as I now so often do!).

Teamwork is a skill – it takes effort to fit in, participate, tolerate and contribute in the team. My four year old is deeply struggling with this. I am sure he loves us, and maybe even likes us a bit. ‘Us’ being the rest of the family. But oh boy, oh boy, he is not showing it. He uses every family activity to upset, or to disrupt, or generally just to make anything not flow. Granted, he is freshly four.

I am patient with him, because I know grown-ups that still need to master teamwork - that has not yet moved on from this disruptive stage, that has yet to learn to work with a group of people, sometimes in spite of themselves, their own ego’s and own agenda’s. Simply, as Aesop puts it: “United we stand, divided we fall.”

Motto Model: http://goo.gl/cNnpy and Motto Individual Assessment: http://goo.gl/UhC7V
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